My mother is here. Everything comes to a screeching halt. Seriously, she is fussing at me for having some items on the sideboard - she wants to put them "away" - and the guest room is strewn with her clutter (makes me cringe inside every time I see it!).
I cannot do projects while she is here. It is a constant - "well, can't you call someone else to come in and do that?" No, I can't. I don't have that kind of money. It's my project - I'll do it once you are gone!
Why can't I enjoy this visit? Why do I feel so "invaded"?? I truly don't know - unless it's the constant questions, "Where did you get that?" "I'm curious as to why you have that there?" "What is that on your calendar? What does it mean?" etc., etc., etc. I won't go into every little detail - even picking up my mail and looking on the outside to see who it's from and then asking me who they are?
She wants me to go out and socialize (with whom?). And, of course, to get rid of my "Korean fantasy world". I haven't been able to dance once since she has been here. Yes, I listen to my music all the time - it helps me breathe.
Finally, the sun is shining and the weather is getting just a little warmer. But I can't sand floors or paint while she is here. I even need to run the carpet cleaner but that's the room she spread all of her papers out on the table on ever since the first night here. Yes, that clutter bothers me in the dining room.
She wants me to totally clean off the sunporch but she also brought boxes and coolers full of food - put them out there and drew in the ants. Been fighting them now for a few days. What did she do to get rid of them? Poured water all over my floor!!!!!!!! I went out there and almost yelled at Jack - thought he had "gone" in the house. When I started mopping it up, then she insisted that she had cleaned it all up and that it was dry. Far from it! I asked her not to go pouring water on my floors - so I sprayed in there. She then moved all those things to the kitchen table - next thing you know - my kitchen is crawling with ants.
Like I said, I cannot "do" any of my projects while she is here. If I disappear for awhile in the house, then she starts screaming for me (and she can't hear my response) so she just screams louder. Again, how can I close myself off and attend to projects when I can't close myself off in the study to work?
I have been totally lectured on how I should be on supplements all week long - and can she start mailing me the things that she takes???
Yes, I am retreating into my "Korean fantasy world" - I can't cope. I am raging inside. The things that she wants to focus on for preparing my house for showings....I am SO stressed.
Why does my mother do this to me? If I hear one more time about how she needs to go pick up the sticks in my yard....And then what? That means I would have to load up my van and haul them all to the dump. I personally don't want to deal with that at the moment. It creates more work for me. No, I can't pay someone to come pick it up and haul it away. (her current response to everything - can she pay someone to sand my floors, to paint the bathroom, to clean my house??). NO! Just let me deal with it after you are gone....
Time to go prepare for class. Another one of my escapes.
I pray that I don't do this to my children. Truly.
Tuesday, April 28, 2015
Sunday, April 26, 2015
Tuesday, April 21, 2015
My Grammie and I ....
My Grammie and I had a very interesting relationship throughout the years. I was always a bit afraid of her. She firmly believed that children should be seen and not heard - so, as long as we weren't noisy I guess she didn't mind being around us. Of course, that meant that we should also spend most of the hours at her house playing outside and remaining out from underfoot.
She definitely preferred the boys - my big brother and my cousin Sam were her two favorites out of all of us. I didn't know my Granddaddy - my brother holds all of his memories - as my Granddaddy was gone by the time I was 2 years old. I must not have been around him that much because I remember my Great-Uncle Charlie and I had to have formed those memories around the same age that my Granddaddy would have still been alive. So, for me, Grammie was always alone. I once asked her why she never remarried after he had died while they were in their 50s and she told me that once you've had the best there is no desire to look elsewhere. My Grammie lived another 50 years after she was left alone. (Yes, she was over 100 and had lived in three centuries when she passed away).
Maybe that's why I've been thinking of her so much recently. My birthday is fast approaching. I'm older than my grandfather was when he passed away. A brain aneurism took him quickly - he never knew what hit him. One moment he was on vacation sitting on the front porch visiting family and the next moment he had keeled over - dead. My big brother adored him - my grandmother adored him - and so did my father - so I guess he was one pretty awesome guy.
So, I am forced to look at my life and think - wow, I could live another 50 years and never be able to experience the love of a good man again. Those kinds of thoughts have to be pushed aside - so that I don't focus on them and become depressed and/or bitter. I have to look at my beautiful children and grandchildren. And, I have to be the kind of Grammie who isn't scary like my old "German bulldog" of a Grammie. She liked me when I was reading poetry or working on genealogy records - other than that I never felt as though I garnished much of her attention.
After all, she is the force who dictated that no one on my father's side of the family would be allowed to attend my wedding in the Catholic church - and they all listened - including my cousins who happened to live in the same city. So, it was monumental when she actually pulled me aside one day and told me that I was "doing it right" in reference to my parenting skills. I think that is probably the last compliment that I ever received from her - if not the only one that I received during my adult years.
Despite my fear of her, one truly had to admire my Grammie. She was in the first graduating class of the School of Nursing at the University of Cincinnati - and she went back to nursing when my Granddaddy left her alone at a relatively "young" age. When she passed away, even though she had lost her eyesight, my Grammie still had full mental faculties. She had a mind like a steel trap, that never forgot anything. She was once a church organist and she always sang in her church choir - all the way up into her 90s.
She was raised bilingual - with her parents being the ones to come to America in the 1880s. The only German phrase that I heard growing up and remembered was "Das ist verboten"! (That is forbidden!). My dad taught me Spanish when I was five years old instead of German. (He had bad memories of his great-grandmother living with them and hitting him with a cane every time he spoke English in the house - he stopped speaking German when she passed away the year that he was 12 - and then he picked it back up again in his 60s).
What a strange background that I came from. Of course, I was distanced from my Grammie over the years because of my Dad's divorces and remarriages. My other grandmother had passed away when I was three and a half years old and she left me with many wonderful memories of playtime and cooking time with her. She was a teacher and loved being around children - in fact, I felt as though she totally doted on me and that her love made up for the lack of love that I felt from my Grammie. Which may make you wonder, why did I decide to be called Grammie by my grandbabies instead of Dear Ma - like my grandmother and my mother chose?
Mainly because, in my mind, there was truly only one Dear Ma in this world. It blew me away when my mother requested to be called that - it just didn't seem right in my mind (not that I ever went against my mother's request). Also, my mother-in-law was another German Grammie - and she was such a warm, playful, loving grandmother (who never played favorites among her grandchildren) that I wanted to be a lot like her.
My Grammie and I both loved poetry, science, and genealogy. I was told that the reason we probably always butted heads was because we were a lot alike. Personally, I was never sure about that one but I do look like her and I will never forget her great words of wisdom: "after a good meal, there is always room for cheesecake".
She definitely preferred the boys - my big brother and my cousin Sam were her two favorites out of all of us. I didn't know my Granddaddy - my brother holds all of his memories - as my Granddaddy was gone by the time I was 2 years old. I must not have been around him that much because I remember my Great-Uncle Charlie and I had to have formed those memories around the same age that my Granddaddy would have still been alive. So, for me, Grammie was always alone. I once asked her why she never remarried after he had died while they were in their 50s and she told me that once you've had the best there is no desire to look elsewhere. My Grammie lived another 50 years after she was left alone. (Yes, she was over 100 and had lived in three centuries when she passed away).
Maybe that's why I've been thinking of her so much recently. My birthday is fast approaching. I'm older than my grandfather was when he passed away. A brain aneurism took him quickly - he never knew what hit him. One moment he was on vacation sitting on the front porch visiting family and the next moment he had keeled over - dead. My big brother adored him - my grandmother adored him - and so did my father - so I guess he was one pretty awesome guy.
So, I am forced to look at my life and think - wow, I could live another 50 years and never be able to experience the love of a good man again. Those kinds of thoughts have to be pushed aside - so that I don't focus on them and become depressed and/or bitter. I have to look at my beautiful children and grandchildren. And, I have to be the kind of Grammie who isn't scary like my old "German bulldog" of a Grammie. She liked me when I was reading poetry or working on genealogy records - other than that I never felt as though I garnished much of her attention.
After all, she is the force who dictated that no one on my father's side of the family would be allowed to attend my wedding in the Catholic church - and they all listened - including my cousins who happened to live in the same city. So, it was monumental when she actually pulled me aside one day and told me that I was "doing it right" in reference to my parenting skills. I think that is probably the last compliment that I ever received from her - if not the only one that I received during my adult years.
Despite my fear of her, one truly had to admire my Grammie. She was in the first graduating class of the School of Nursing at the University of Cincinnati - and she went back to nursing when my Granddaddy left her alone at a relatively "young" age. When she passed away, even though she had lost her eyesight, my Grammie still had full mental faculties. She had a mind like a steel trap, that never forgot anything. She was once a church organist and she always sang in her church choir - all the way up into her 90s.
She was raised bilingual - with her parents being the ones to come to America in the 1880s. The only German phrase that I heard growing up and remembered was "Das ist verboten"! (That is forbidden!). My dad taught me Spanish when I was five years old instead of German. (He had bad memories of his great-grandmother living with them and hitting him with a cane every time he spoke English in the house - he stopped speaking German when she passed away the year that he was 12 - and then he picked it back up again in his 60s).
What a strange background that I came from. Of course, I was distanced from my Grammie over the years because of my Dad's divorces and remarriages. My other grandmother had passed away when I was three and a half years old and she left me with many wonderful memories of playtime and cooking time with her. She was a teacher and loved being around children - in fact, I felt as though she totally doted on me and that her love made up for the lack of love that I felt from my Grammie. Which may make you wonder, why did I decide to be called Grammie by my grandbabies instead of Dear Ma - like my grandmother and my mother chose?
Mainly because, in my mind, there was truly only one Dear Ma in this world. It blew me away when my mother requested to be called that - it just didn't seem right in my mind (not that I ever went against my mother's request). Also, my mother-in-law was another German Grammie - and she was such a warm, playful, loving grandmother (who never played favorites among her grandchildren) that I wanted to be a lot like her.
My Grammie and I both loved poetry, science, and genealogy. I was told that the reason we probably always butted heads was because we were a lot alike. Personally, I was never sure about that one but I do look like her and I will never forget her great words of wisdom: "after a good meal, there is always room for cheesecake".
Sunday, April 12, 2015
My heart hurts....
I'll admit it. I am having a really, really tough weekend.
He came over today to take care of some things here at the house. He was over here yesterday, too. Both times I had seemingly very comfortable conversations. Afterwards, the tears don't stop. Not like when you are uncontrollably sobbing - but more like your eyes just can't stop "leaking".
It certainly doesn't help that today is grey and overcast (I am very affected by weather - can handle things much better when the sun shines brightly). I need to get everything fixed here at the house - and put it back into "spotless" mode. This house needs to sell soon - this state really isn't big enough for the two of us anymore.
I also need to get EVERYTHING completed for my applications to jobs in another state. I will move first if I get a job elsewhere - and leave the house behind for the moment.
As I said, my heart hurts....memories are strong as I clean out, throw away, re-decorate. In the meantime, I will put on a brave face, smile, and act like nothing is going on.... I will focus on images like this of Jonghyun's smile (which even makes me smile through my tears as it is one that "brightens up the world").
He came over today to take care of some things here at the house. He was over here yesterday, too. Both times I had seemingly very comfortable conversations. Afterwards, the tears don't stop. Not like when you are uncontrollably sobbing - but more like your eyes just can't stop "leaking".
It certainly doesn't help that today is grey and overcast (I am very affected by weather - can handle things much better when the sun shines brightly). I need to get everything fixed here at the house - and put it back into "spotless" mode. This house needs to sell soon - this state really isn't big enough for the two of us anymore.
I also need to get EVERYTHING completed for my applications to jobs in another state. I will move first if I get a job elsewhere - and leave the house behind for the moment.
As I said, my heart hurts....memories are strong as I clean out, throw away, re-decorate. In the meantime, I will put on a brave face, smile, and act like nothing is going on.... I will focus on images like this of Jonghyun's smile (which even makes me smile through my tears as it is one that "brightens up the world").
Sunday, March 22, 2015
Beyond the Ides of March....
Spring is supposedly here. We've had two nice days of warm weather and the forecast is for freezing temps by morning.
Depression comes and goes. I no longer have all the meds in my system that my doctors had prescribed so I'm coping through prayer, music, and K-dramas. Yep, they all help.
However, going to church is becoming more and more difficult in this community. I feel as though I've lost not only my home - but my place in my faith community. I am "just" a visitor - no longer connected to anything within the parish. And, if I make a mistake, like I did today and end up at Mass with him - then I find that the pain is too much. I had to leave my seat as soon as I sat down this morning - not realizing that he was there (for that Mass has been safe for the past few Sundays) - but then I looked up and saw him. I immediately couldn't breathe and got up - fighting to stay inside the church and not walk out - I ended up sitting in the very back, with my view blocked. It doesn't help that he sings when he is there because I can't block that out. I pulled out my rosary and immediately started praying for my Holy Mother's help.
It didn't stop the tears - but it did give me some strength. Strength to remain and to focus on Jesus.
Will I always be this weak? Will I continue to cry whenever I see him or hear him? Will the migraines continue to hit - out of the blue?
Spring is supposed to be about new beginnings - when will I feel as though I've truly stepped into spring?
Depression comes and goes. I no longer have all the meds in my system that my doctors had prescribed so I'm coping through prayer, music, and K-dramas. Yep, they all help.
However, going to church is becoming more and more difficult in this community. I feel as though I've lost not only my home - but my place in my faith community. I am "just" a visitor - no longer connected to anything within the parish. And, if I make a mistake, like I did today and end up at Mass with him - then I find that the pain is too much. I had to leave my seat as soon as I sat down this morning - not realizing that he was there (for that Mass has been safe for the past few Sundays) - but then I looked up and saw him. I immediately couldn't breathe and got up - fighting to stay inside the church and not walk out - I ended up sitting in the very back, with my view blocked. It doesn't help that he sings when he is there because I can't block that out. I pulled out my rosary and immediately started praying for my Holy Mother's help.
It didn't stop the tears - but it did give me some strength. Strength to remain and to focus on Jesus.
Will I always be this weak? Will I continue to cry whenever I see him or hear him? Will the migraines continue to hit - out of the blue?
Spring is supposed to be about new beginnings - when will I feel as though I've truly stepped into spring?
Sunday, March 1, 2015
Severely
Okay, so this is the saddest music video ever, beautifully sung and acted by Lee Hong Ki (my bias in FT Island). Truly, watch it and weep.
This morning, the alarm didn't awaken me. My dreams did. (Or nightmares). I was sobbing in my dream - brokenhearted for my child (who was a little one) - she had just been emotionally hurt and I had my arms around her, I remember fussing at him because he had caused the hurt, and there he was - putting his arms around me to comfort me. And the thought went through my head, "what are you doing? you haven't cared about me for so long?" - and I woke up.
And the snow is still coming down - and I must really be experiencing some Lenten sorrows. The depression is deep and the snow makes it worse.
Saturday, February 28, 2015
It's been a rough week - no, month - really. Jinjja.
"WE MADE IT THROUGH FEBRUARY!!!! I thought we wouldn't. Seriously."
That's the status on one of my dear friend's facebook walls today. It feels ominous. However, after yesterday, I feel as though the worst has already hit and she's right, we're going to make it out of this month.
This has been a month of copious amounts of snow. All across the mid-section of the country up through the northeast. Kentucky is still frozen under and Boston has SO much of the white stuff that they've been trucking it out. seriously. Jinjja. One of the funniest reactions was this:
http://www.nbcwashington.com/news/national-international/Harlan-Kentucky-Warrant-Frozen-Elsa-292729731.html?_osource=SocialFlowFB_DCBrand
But it has been no joke!
Then, yesterday, I wasn't feeling well so I stayed in bed most of the morning - only to arise to this news:
I don't know how to express to you how deeply this affects me. I've been crying off and on since I heard the news. It's like losing Elvis, Yul Brynner, Davy Jones....I wanted to grow up and marry Spock and I even considered attending Antioch College just so that I could tread the same pathways as Leonard Nimoy (but that campus was within my "day's drive" radius and I ended up ruling it out). Truly, my husband was tall, dark, handsome and logical - qualities that I so admired in the character of Spock. I feel almost as though my "first love" has passed away.
It was already a rough week - returning home after spending about 10 days with my grandbabies - missing them SO much! I cannot tell you how much it means to me to have my babies around me but their precious Little Women and Little Men are something else.
Oh, on top of that, I lost my job. Nothing like feeling like a failure once again.
Really, I "suck" at life. I can't seem to do anything well. Seriously, I'm divorced (which I never, ever, ever wanted to be) with no hopes of ever having a man in my life again - unless my husband comes to his senses and returns home. (And why should he? He's probably happy now without me). (One of my priest friends has felt all along that he's possessed and that I just need to keep the faith and keep praying and stay strong - that's SO hard!). My house isn't going to sell for awhile because I can't afford to paint the outside and that's where all my money is tied up. (Yes, I'm continuing to do things inside - but I'm limited by my strength and my funds). And, I'm not brilliant - I'm just a jack-of-all-trades and master of none. I'm a mediocre teacher - obviously, otherwise I'd be in high demand. I start projects all the time and never get them finished. I've always been the person who throws the party that no one shows up at. That's me. I've always thought I had great friends - but no one has ever missed me "really" when I've moved away. Ever. I'm THAT non-descript person - the one who returns for class reunions and people don't remember who you are or "were".
There is not one single person who wants to talk to me every single day except for my mother. How sad is that? I used to have friends that were inseparable. What happened?
That's the status on one of my dear friend's facebook walls today. It feels ominous. However, after yesterday, I feel as though the worst has already hit and she's right, we're going to make it out of this month.
This has been a month of copious amounts of snow. All across the mid-section of the country up through the northeast. Kentucky is still frozen under and Boston has SO much of the white stuff that they've been trucking it out. seriously. Jinjja. One of the funniest reactions was this:
http://www.nbcwashington.com/news/national-international/Harlan-Kentucky-Warrant-Frozen-Elsa-292729731.html?_osource=SocialFlowFB_DCBrand
But it has been no joke!
Then, yesterday, I wasn't feeling well so I stayed in bed most of the morning - only to arise to this news:
I don't know how to express to you how deeply this affects me. I've been crying off and on since I heard the news. It's like losing Elvis, Yul Brynner, Davy Jones....I wanted to grow up and marry Spock and I even considered attending Antioch College just so that I could tread the same pathways as Leonard Nimoy (but that campus was within my "day's drive" radius and I ended up ruling it out). Truly, my husband was tall, dark, handsome and logical - qualities that I so admired in the character of Spock. I feel almost as though my "first love" has passed away.
It was already a rough week - returning home after spending about 10 days with my grandbabies - missing them SO much! I cannot tell you how much it means to me to have my babies around me but their precious Little Women and Little Men are something else.
Oh, on top of that, I lost my job. Nothing like feeling like a failure once again.
Really, I "suck" at life. I can't seem to do anything well. Seriously, I'm divorced (which I never, ever, ever wanted to be) with no hopes of ever having a man in my life again - unless my husband comes to his senses and returns home. (And why should he? He's probably happy now without me). (One of my priest friends has felt all along that he's possessed and that I just need to keep the faith and keep praying and stay strong - that's SO hard!). My house isn't going to sell for awhile because I can't afford to paint the outside and that's where all my money is tied up. (Yes, I'm continuing to do things inside - but I'm limited by my strength and my funds). And, I'm not brilliant - I'm just a jack-of-all-trades and master of none. I'm a mediocre teacher - obviously, otherwise I'd be in high demand. I start projects all the time and never get them finished. I've always been the person who throws the party that no one shows up at. That's me. I've always thought I had great friends - but no one has ever missed me "really" when I've moved away. Ever. I'm THAT non-descript person - the one who returns for class reunions and people don't remember who you are or "were".
There is not one single person who wants to talk to me every single day except for my mother. How sad is that? I used to have friends that were inseparable. What happened?
Friday, February 27, 2015
Musings
I don't get much time to speak with my "sons". But when I do, I feel so incredibly blessed that my daughters found such wonderful young men to spend their lives with and to bring "home". Truly, I love them as much as if they were my own - of course, you already knew that I had that kind of heart. But these young men are THAT special - loving my daughters, protecting them, and being the kind, compassionate men that they are. I watch them as they attend to my girls - and to their babies - and my heart just swells with joy (and love).
They may not always understand me - but they listen to me. And I love the conversations that we do have time to have. I like hearing about their work - their interests - and their dreams. One recent comment stuck with me - because it brought back echoes from my past : "I wish the world thought it was cool to be Korean". Wow! That one caught me off guard. I thought that "the world" had come a long, long way from my college days. I thought it was "cool" back then. In the 70s, I dated a young man who was half Korean/half Japanese who told me that he had been "stoned" every day after school in Japan because he was "half Korean". The Asian world (China and Japan) looked down upon the Koreans and he couldn't "hide" it because his name was Korean. He came to study in America to escape that kind of prejudice.
Honestly, I've always thought that Asian men are the most beautiful men in the world. Examples from my childhood? Yul Brynner (yes, I'd call Mongolian Asian!), Bruce Lee, James Shigeta, George Takei, Keye Luke, Philip Ahn....(Won Young Cho, Byung Sun Kim, Denny Minami, John Kuo, Moses Lee - oh, yes, you don't know them! My, they were so gorgeous! And, my roommate and best friend heard an awful lot about that - especially since I went out with a couple of them). But, take a look now - Asian men have become even more beautiful! So, why isn't it considered "cool" to be Korean? I've been pondering this. For days.
Korea = Samsung. Hyundai. LG Chem. Kia Motors. POSCO (4th largest steelmaker in the world - backed by Warren Buffet!). K-Pop (yes, this is becoming HUGE! Nickelodeon is going to be producing a show about a K-pop group backed by Nick Cannon) and K-dramas (my "bias" is showing - pun intended - better than American TV because it still concedes to morality and leaves a lot to the imagination). Korean Baseball. Soccer. Golf. Taekwondo. Who hasn't cheered for some of the Koreans in the Olympics???? Rankings of Math/Science students in the world? Korea is usually up there in the top 5! Really? Not cool to be Korean???
But, I did see something disturbing at my niece's wedding at West Point - my son-in-law got profiled. That long line of cars going through to the wedding - his is the one pulled over. Big Bro is the retired policeman so he had to show that he wasn't packing - but that was expected - my son-in-law being requested to pull over wasn't. He handled it so well. His Uncle Rick was very proud of him (as was I). However, is that what he feels on a daily basis? That's one of the many things that I've been pondering. If so, then that makes me very sad. Because he should be so VERY proud of his heritage. It's awesome, you know. Just like with any of the rest of us. We should all be able to look at our roots and be loud and proud. He's a totally American kid - raised in the Buckeye state - half Korean/half Chinese by heritage. What a rich heritage to pass on to their babies in addition to our side of the family! What a great melting pot America is - and should be! (My other set of grandbabies are part Chilean! :) )
However, I think Korean is SO cool that I am learning the language. Immersing myself in the music and the K-dramas. Reading the stories and studying the history. (Just like when I studied Russian in college). Someday, I hope that I can be fluent enough to become a translator and I really do want to go to Korea with his mom when she retires - and take our shared kids and grandbabies and enjoy her country!
I'm not the only one who thinks K-pop is awesome - check out Uzbekistani figure skater, Misha Ge:
And this is one of my favorite singers, Rain (Jung Ji Hoon), in an American film, Ninja Assassin:
And, I'm going to leave you with a photo gallery of some of my favorite idols/stars:
They may not always understand me - but they listen to me. And I love the conversations that we do have time to have. I like hearing about their work - their interests - and their dreams. One recent comment stuck with me - because it brought back echoes from my past : "I wish the world thought it was cool to be Korean". Wow! That one caught me off guard. I thought that "the world" had come a long, long way from my college days. I thought it was "cool" back then. In the 70s, I dated a young man who was half Korean/half Japanese who told me that he had been "stoned" every day after school in Japan because he was "half Korean". The Asian world (China and Japan) looked down upon the Koreans and he couldn't "hide" it because his name was Korean. He came to study in America to escape that kind of prejudice.
Honestly, I've always thought that Asian men are the most beautiful men in the world. Examples from my childhood? Yul Brynner (yes, I'd call Mongolian Asian!), Bruce Lee, James Shigeta, George Takei, Keye Luke, Philip Ahn....(Won Young Cho, Byung Sun Kim, Denny Minami, John Kuo, Moses Lee - oh, yes, you don't know them! My, they were so gorgeous! And, my roommate and best friend heard an awful lot about that - especially since I went out with a couple of them). But, take a look now - Asian men have become even more beautiful! So, why isn't it considered "cool" to be Korean? I've been pondering this. For days.
Korea = Samsung. Hyundai. LG Chem. Kia Motors. POSCO (4th largest steelmaker in the world - backed by Warren Buffet!). K-Pop (yes, this is becoming HUGE! Nickelodeon is going to be producing a show about a K-pop group backed by Nick Cannon) and K-dramas (my "bias" is showing - pun intended - better than American TV because it still concedes to morality and leaves a lot to the imagination). Korean Baseball. Soccer. Golf. Taekwondo. Who hasn't cheered for some of the Koreans in the Olympics???? Rankings of Math/Science students in the world? Korea is usually up there in the top 5! Really? Not cool to be Korean???
But, I did see something disturbing at my niece's wedding at West Point - my son-in-law got profiled. That long line of cars going through to the wedding - his is the one pulled over. Big Bro is the retired policeman so he had to show that he wasn't packing - but that was expected - my son-in-law being requested to pull over wasn't. He handled it so well. His Uncle Rick was very proud of him (as was I). However, is that what he feels on a daily basis? That's one of the many things that I've been pondering. If so, then that makes me very sad. Because he should be so VERY proud of his heritage. It's awesome, you know. Just like with any of the rest of us. We should all be able to look at our roots and be loud and proud. He's a totally American kid - raised in the Buckeye state - half Korean/half Chinese by heritage. What a rich heritage to pass on to their babies in addition to our side of the family! What a great melting pot America is - and should be! (My other set of grandbabies are part Chilean! :) )
However, I think Korean is SO cool that I am learning the language. Immersing myself in the music and the K-dramas. Reading the stories and studying the history. (Just like when I studied Russian in college). Someday, I hope that I can be fluent enough to become a translator and I really do want to go to Korea with his mom when she retires - and take our shared kids and grandbabies and enjoy her country!
I'm not the only one who thinks K-pop is awesome - check out Uzbekistani figure skater, Misha Ge:
And this is one of my favorite singers, Rain (Jung Ji Hoon), in an American film, Ninja Assassin:
Rain singing:
And, I'm going to leave you with a photo gallery of some of my favorite idols/stars:
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| Wait for me! Hyun Bin |
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| Song Seung Heon |
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| Kim Soo Hyun |
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| Lee Min Ho |
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| Ji Chang Wook and Park Min Young from Healer |
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| Lee Min Ho |
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| Taecyeon |
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| Lee Joon |
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| Lee Min Ho |
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| No Min Woo |
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| Ji Chang Wook |
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| So Ji Sub |
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| Kim Jae Joong |
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| Kim Jae Joong |
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| Jung Yong Hwa |
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| Hyun Bin |
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| Kim Jae Joong |
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| Kim Jae Joong |
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| Lee Sang Yoon |
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| Lee Joon Gi |
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| JYJ - Junsu, Jaejoong, Yoochun |
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| Lee Jong Suk |
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| Park Hae Jin and Lee Jong Suk |
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| Park Hae Jin |
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| Infinite |
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| Jung Yong Hwa |
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| Rain - Jung Ji Hoon |
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| L from Infinite |
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| Nichkhun, Taecyeon, Chansung from 2PM |
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| Choi Jin Hyuk |
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| Song Seung Heon |
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| Hong Jong Hyun |
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| Park Shi Hoo |
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| SHINee |
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| CNBLUE - YongHwa, Jungshin, Jonghyun, Minhyuk |
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| Super Junior You see, this just adds more proof in my mind as to how "cool" and how gorgeous Koreans are. Totally "daebak"! |
Wednesday, February 18, 2015
Spending a week with my "Little Man"
First off, I must give kudos to both of my married daughters for providing me with plenty of opportunities to see their family routines in action. Why is that so important? For times like this - and at Christmas (when Little Man #2 was born) - when I am called in to assist with "Grammie" duties.
It is my joy and my pleasure to be able to spend this week with my first Little Man while his mommy and daddy are attending a destination wedding in a much warmer climate. Fortunately, we happen to be close to Uncle A and Aunt C and my other "littles" - allowing us to have some good "cousin" time and enjoying the wonderful influence that his Godparents have upon his life. (Yep, Uncle A and Aunt C have that uncanny knack of being able to convince him to do things that usually are met with that toddler "No!").
What am I learning about my Little Man this week? Well, let's just say that Mommy and Daddy were awfully wise to gift him with three things before they left: a soft baby doll, a toy laptop, and a "toy" broom and dustpan set. "Baby" has supplanted "Monkey" as the go-to toy for all things needing comforting. Baby does everything with Little Man - sleeps with him, gets dragged around by him, waits for him on the rocking horse as he eats breakfast, lunch, and dinner - however, when Little Man decides that he wants to clean the kitchen floor with his broom, then Grammie must watch over Baby. If Little Man is upset about anything, then Baby is called upon and is lavished with hugs.
The laptop is adorable. Grammie teaches online classes - and Little Man sits at his play table and works on his little laptop. It is too precious for words! When his cousins were over, it was the coveted toy that everyone wanted time with and we really had to work hard on "sharing". And, the broom set. Well, that kitchen floor has got to be one of the cleanest ones around because it gets swept about 20 times per day!
Little Man knows where the picture books are that have photos of Mommy and Daddy - he will go get those off of the shelf when he needs to feel close to them. We have added saying "Good night" to their photos in the living room to the nightly bedtime routine. He points out "Mama" and "Da-da" and waves to them. We include them in our prayers and I remind him that they will be home in a few days but that Grammie will be here for him in the meantime.
He is definitely a self-sufficient little do-er. He welcomes play-time, dance-time, and reading time with me but he does just fine on his own. He carries on all kinds of conversations - engaged in imaginative play - babbling in his little toddler-speak. Toys may get dragged out - and spread all over - but they are just as easily put back away. He has no problems about helping clean up.
Typically, he saves story time for just before nap-time and bedtime but, every now and then, he'll pull out a book and just want some cuddle time. And, when we both need just a little break - Blue's Clues! Honestly, I could rave about my Little Man for pages. The only difficulty that I truly have is figuring out what he will actually eat at lunch and dinner. (He's pretty consistent about breakfast!). I guess that could be the subject of an entire post.
Anyway, thanks to my daughters and their beautiful families, this Grammie certainly feels much love and happiness and truly blessed!
It is my joy and my pleasure to be able to spend this week with my first Little Man while his mommy and daddy are attending a destination wedding in a much warmer climate. Fortunately, we happen to be close to Uncle A and Aunt C and my other "littles" - allowing us to have some good "cousin" time and enjoying the wonderful influence that his Godparents have upon his life. (Yep, Uncle A and Aunt C have that uncanny knack of being able to convince him to do things that usually are met with that toddler "No!").
What am I learning about my Little Man this week? Well, let's just say that Mommy and Daddy were awfully wise to gift him with three things before they left: a soft baby doll, a toy laptop, and a "toy" broom and dustpan set. "Baby" has supplanted "Monkey" as the go-to toy for all things needing comforting. Baby does everything with Little Man - sleeps with him, gets dragged around by him, waits for him on the rocking horse as he eats breakfast, lunch, and dinner - however, when Little Man decides that he wants to clean the kitchen floor with his broom, then Grammie must watch over Baby. If Little Man is upset about anything, then Baby is called upon and is lavished with hugs.
The laptop is adorable. Grammie teaches online classes - and Little Man sits at his play table and works on his little laptop. It is too precious for words! When his cousins were over, it was the coveted toy that everyone wanted time with and we really had to work hard on "sharing". And, the broom set. Well, that kitchen floor has got to be one of the cleanest ones around because it gets swept about 20 times per day!
Little Man knows where the picture books are that have photos of Mommy and Daddy - he will go get those off of the shelf when he needs to feel close to them. We have added saying "Good night" to their photos in the living room to the nightly bedtime routine. He points out "Mama" and "Da-da" and waves to them. We include them in our prayers and I remind him that they will be home in a few days but that Grammie will be here for him in the meantime.
He is definitely a self-sufficient little do-er. He welcomes play-time, dance-time, and reading time with me but he does just fine on his own. He carries on all kinds of conversations - engaged in imaginative play - babbling in his little toddler-speak. Toys may get dragged out - and spread all over - but they are just as easily put back away. He has no problems about helping clean up.
Typically, he saves story time for just before nap-time and bedtime but, every now and then, he'll pull out a book and just want some cuddle time. And, when we both need just a little break - Blue's Clues! Honestly, I could rave about my Little Man for pages. The only difficulty that I truly have is figuring out what he will actually eat at lunch and dinner. (He's pretty consistent about breakfast!). I guess that could be the subject of an entire post.
Anyway, thanks to my daughters and their beautiful families, this Grammie certainly feels much love and happiness and truly blessed!
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